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Quarter Life Crisis March 9, 2011

Posted by frewon9 in Inspirational.

Quarter Life Crisis AKA The Great Ambition Killer Quarter life crisis is a common occurrence to people in the mid to late 20s. Young adults feel obsessively depressed about a lot of things. This ranges from physical, emotional, financial insecurities that they start facing once they enter the real world. To a lot of these troubled young adults, it starts as a general feeling of having no sense of direction regarding where they want their lives to go. Most adults go through this after graduating college. This is the stage where they have to prove true every theory taught to them during their academic years. Many young men and women who are fresh graduates are idealistic in picking work at this stage of their lives. They feel a need to prove to others, most especially to themselves, that they are going to be able to apply everything they’ve learned from school on the job they’ve chosen. Disappointments start setting in once they’re rejected from their chosen jobs. Young people have a tendency to start sour-graping about jobs that are rejected them. This is a typical defense mechanism by young people to protect their broken ego. They either give excuses that the job that rejected them wasn’t intellectually-stimulating enough, or that the compensation was not enough for their talents. Emotional insecurities also come into play during quarter life crisis. Young adults start questioning themselves whether they’re good enough to be with somebody. Some would start questioning their own identity and sexual preference. Some would start seeing every little thing as their fault and start blaming themselves for everything that goes wrong. Young adults who are unable to cope start getting into bouts of depression and eventually end up as recluses from society, afraid and always on guard. Most people who experience quarter life crisis are often achievers as children. They tend to obsess at what they’ve achieved in the past, what they’re doing in the present, and what they will be doing in the future. These people usually dwell on what they have been able to establish in the past, and wallow at the thought of how they can’t seem to make the same accomplishments in the present. They start worrying if they’ll ever be able to come back to the achiever they were before. They start doubting their ability to make their goals materialize. Usually, young adults are able to pick up the pieces and start moving forward. They recover from whatever insecurities they may be feeling and start taking charge of their lives. Unfortunately, not everybody is strong enough to go back to riding the same horse that they fell from. Some people are simply unable to cope and just decide to stay on the ground and mourn over what’s already lost. Some decide to stay in a state of denial and justify everything that’s happened. Some will resort to taking medications to calm down or even forget. A lot of mental health professionals suggest taking anti-depressants to help people who have been suffering from quarter life crisis for a long time already. Anti-depressants are medications commonly used as prescription for people suffering from depression. It is used to treat certain psychological conditions such as anxiety disorders, bipolar disorder, obsessive compulsive disorder, eating disorders and chronic pain. It is also commonly misused to generate a false sense of calm for people who think they’re lives are worst that everybody else’s. Of course, anti-depressants should only be used when it is prescribed by a trusted doctor as it may have side effects to your body in the long run. We have bouts of depression that linger for a few years, usually without our knowing why. And it usually occurs in our early 20s, and it’s more commonly termed as quarter-life crisis. What is this concept? Is it a myth? How can I overcome this? Everybody has their occasional downs in life–the most common are caused by breakups, death in the family, failure to achieve something or a major fight with somebody you care about. What most people don’t know yet, however, is that long period of depression experienced by young adults more commonly termed as quarter-life crisis. The profile of these people who normally experience quarter-life crisis are in their early twenties, usually new graduates and are on their first or second job. There have been many speculations as to what may be causing this so-called quarter-life crisis. It is said that the harsh realities of life are usually hard to swallow for these young, idealistic individuals, once they realize that the world isn’t as perfect or normal as thought it was. The most common cause is work, when they realize the empty promise of chasing money and a promotion, and the sense of loss at having let go of what they’re truly passionate about. It’s a common feeling of being unsure of one’s identity, what you stand for in this world, and what life should really be about. 2 Corinthians 12:9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. Philippians 4:19 And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Romans 8:1 There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. Psalm 34:17-20 When the righteous cry for help, the Lord hears and delivers them out of all their troubles. The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit. Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but the Lord delivers him out of them all. He keeps all his bones; not one of them is broken. 1. Know who you are. There is nothing worse than being lost in a world where you don’t know exactly who you are, what you stand for and what you value. At times when situations get confusing and messed up, people who are rooted in solid values normally fare better than those who aren’t. A solid set of values is like a compass: it guides you on which direction you should take, even if you can’t see so clearly ahead of you because of a storm. 2. Look to your family and loved ones for help. At times we get so caught up in attempting to climb the corporate ladder and the anxieties that we feel with regards to our status in society (am I rich enough? good-looking enough? smart enough? succesful enough?). It helps to be in the company of those who truly appreciate who we are, no matter what we are in any stage in our lives. It’s a great way to build morale, remind you of what is “real” in life andmaybe even help remind you of who you really are. 3. Do what you love. Let’s say you’ve always wanted to be a writer but while growing up, you were told that writers don’t make much money. You won’t get too far in the corporate ladder as writer. So you end up taking up Management in college, get an MBA and work for one of the biggest multinationals in the world. You make big money, you have a nice car, lots of “friends”, but somehow something’s still missing. You know what it is. There’s nothing more painful in life than denying what it is you truly love to do (aside from, of course, denying who you really are. But passions are just as big a part of you as your values). Start out by engaging yourself in these passions again, by bring them back into your life little by little. Start it out as a hobby. Escalate. Baby steps. Do not be scared. 4. Do not be scared. Do not be scared to admit to yourself that there is a problem or that something’s wrong at this stage in your life. Some people wander through life, choosing to ignore these early signs of being lost and denying their real selves. These are the people who, at 40 or 50, suddenly find themselves in a much deeper depression, after realizing that they wasted away their lives doing things that don’t mean much to them after all. And by the time they realize it, they don’t have the same energy, zeal and enthusiasm as they used to. If you feel that you are not living your life the way you ought to, look deep inside yourself and decide on what you want from life. And act on it. 5. Get off your bum an act! Of course, much introspection alone won’t get you anywhere. Have the courage and drive to act on the things that you feel you need to change in your life. The point is to never ignore your passions. Because these are the very things that define who you are. Passionate people are much more interesting than those who do things just for the sake of it. Do what you love and don’t be scared to let the whole world know about it! Abbey Grace Yap



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